Oops!

I am thankful for repentance. I messed up yesterday and than again today. Yesterday Holly called and asked if I would do a favor for her. I told her I would do it and then didn't get a chance to. Richard's brother died the other day and she wanted me to take something to Richard since she is out of town. I am sorry I didn't do it yesterday. I am swamped again today with kids, but this afternoon when I get a break I will go do it. Richard I am sorry for your grief. I am sorry that I didn't do what I said I would do.
At Bountiful Baskets a woman was frustrated and yelled at me. She had also booked the gym for a party and we were in her way. I was discombobulated by the yelling, and wasn't the nicest I could have been. I am sorry I didn't stop what I was doing and try to help her with her needs. She apoligized to me later, and I to her, but it still doesn't take it away
I am thankful that Heavenly Father put a plan in so we can repent and become better. I listened to my Alex Boye CD on the way home and it is really all about us helping each other out. I am recommitted to do a better job at it

Grandkids

I am thankful for my grandkids. I love each one. They are all different, and that just makes it better. Heavenly Father sent me the first 3, Bryton, Desi and Tommy at a time in my life when I needed a lift. They filled my soul with the joy that had been missing for a while. Let's talk about the kids.

Bryton is 9. He likes Karate, Cub Scouts, and playing games. He's a smart boy and recently got a great report card. He's been living with me for his whole life. I'm not his mom and I know that but sometimes it still seems so. He'll be moving away soon. I know it is the right thing for him and his mom, but for me it is already ripping my guts out. Now I'm crying so I'm just going to move on to the rest.

Desi is 9. She loves to dance. In March her mom and I are taking her to Florida to compete with her team for the national dance championship. They have a good chance of winning. Her last report card was all A's. She wants to be a teacher some day. Desi is the one that teases me and I love it. She often sticks out her tongue and says Ha ha when I mess up. We both think it's funny

Tommy is 8. He lives in Canada so I don't see him so much. He is a tender child. He cares about other people and how they feel. He is a peacemaker. He loves sports of all kind. I recently had the joy of attending his baptism. He is a good helper for his mom. His family spent a few weeks with us in October and I loved getting to know him better.

Ariana is 5. She started kindergarten and she loves it. She is learning so fast. She loves to dance too, and is in her first year of competing. A year ago she played a little sister in the nutcracker. It is in the first act, and then she was finished. Her mom went back stage to get her and found her dressed to be a candy cane. She wanted so desperately to go out on stage again, and she almost made it. Ariana makes me laugh.

Devin is 4. He is all boy. He learned how to ride a 2 wheeler last year, and now he can go anywhere. He likes to fix things. He is happiest with something to take apart. He carries a tape measure most of the time. I've given him a few things here to fix and he did it. He loves hanging out with his dad. I love to listen to him talk. Some of his words come out messed up and sound so cute.

Sophia is 4. She is all princess. She is all about dress up and makeup and girl play. Sophia reminds me of the princess and the pea. She has a wonderful imagination. I watched her perform in the nutcracker this year and she did a great job at it. Tonight she and Lucy are coming over while the parents go out for the night. I can hardly wait as I don't get to see them much.

Kyla is 2. She is my adventure girl. She recently climbed up in the closet to get the candy down. It gave her mom quite a scare. She does these kinds of things a lot and keeps life refreshing. Her mom is currently working on potty training with some sucess.

Lucy is almost 2. Now Lucy is my baby. She is the last one I have had here in my home for many hours. I used to sit and hold her for hours. She is so sweet and soft. I don't see her much any more, and I don't even know if she remembers me. The last time I saw her on Thanksgiving she just looked at me like she had never seen me before.

Macy is 10 months. Macy has Down Syndrome. Right now, she is a baby like any other. She is fun to hold and cuddle, and a joy to watch her learn. I attended her baby blessing and it was a time I will remember forever. She had been very ill up until the blessing and has been fine since. The words of the blessing were inspiring to me and I felt that angels were in the room with us. I know Heavenly Father is mindful of her. I pray that as she grows she will be accepted by her peers, and that she will have the ability to love life.

I love these children. Thank you Heavenly Father for letting me have each of them in my life.

Water

I an thankful for water. I love it in all its forms. Let's start with natural bodies of water. Oceans, lakes, streams, waterfalls, rain (especially in the summer with thunderstorms). There is nothing I like better than swimming in the waves at the beach. I like to go way out and bob in the waves and when a huge one comes dive into it and come out of the other side. It is also fun on a boogie board. Swimming at Bear Lake is pretty cool too.In the pictures above we are at Zion's. Stella had a suit on under her clothes, but I didn't. I couldn't resist the water so I just took off my shoes and went in with all my clothes on. I had to go back to the condo soaking wet, but it was so worth it. We plan to go there again next summer. Tubing at Lava in Idaho is a blast. I also love cruising on the ocean. I can just sit and watch the water and be content. Next how about swimming pools and hut tubs. Talk about a good way to relax. Then there is the lazy river and wave pool at Seven Peaks. I haven't been there in a few years but I just bought a season pass. I can't wait to get to use it. Next how about a hot shower or bath. I like to linger when I can , but even a quick one makes be feel so much better. I also love the feel of just washing hands. It makes me feel so good. Then if that wasn't enough, how about a drink of water. Nothing quenches my thirst like water. I drink it straight from the tap.I love love love water any day in any way. Thank you Heavenly Father for this.

Peace and quiet

Today I am tired. I was up in the wee hours of the night with a child who was ill. The lack of sleep is wearing me down. I am grateful that today was an easy day. There are just a few children left and it is very calm. I am going to read scriptures and take it easy. All the work that needs to be done will have to wait until tomorrow.

Christmas

Tuesday Dec 7
I am thankful for Christmas. It is my favorite holiday. I LOVE everything about Christmas with one exception. I love the music, lights, decorations, smells, treats, parties and on and on. I love Santa. He embodies for me the service we do for one another. Heavenly Father expects us to do for others and Santa is the best example I know. I have a santa collection, and my favorite is santa kneeling at the manger. I know Santa would be the first to follow Christ. All this being said I HATE Christmas Day. It entails a lot of work, stress, frustration, and way too much money. On my recent vacation we took the boys to lego land and said they could pick out one item to keep. They searched carefully and each came up with their item. Both boys were happy for days with the $10.00 toy they had chosen. I hate that on Christmas this can't be so. Everybody gets so many things that most are disregarded. Much ends up in the trash a few days later. If I could find a way to simplify and make it more of a celebration of Christ I would. In the Christmas Devotional, Elder U (sp) talked about The Grinch, and said we all probably feel a little like this and talked of ways to make it better. I Love the Savior and want to follow him. I know he was born in manger, and is the Son of GOD. I know he walked the areas of Judea and performed miracles, and taught the people of Heavenly Father . I know he suffered in Gethsemane(sp) for my sins, as well as everyone else's. I know he hung on the cross so that we could all live again after we die. I believe this with all my heart. I know he later came to the Americas and taught the people here. I have all my life wondered what it would have been like to have been there when he blessed the children. Now knowing all this, I must begin today to make it the holiday I want it to be and not necessarily the one the world might expect. I will begin first off today to read Luke Chapter 2. Then I will follow up with 3rd Nephi. I'm open for any help I can get as I try to find Christmas this year.

Fran's Kids

Monday Dec 6
I am thankful for my job. I truly love working with the children. I love each and every one of them. I am thankful that I make enough money that I can live the life I do and get some fun extras too. Of course it would be nice if my boss would give me a Christmas Bonus, or some extra days off, but she said no. Who do you know that gets to go for walks and bike rides in the summer; do all sorts of crafts and read stories, watch The Grinch over and over, and play games and get paid for it. When I see a child smile it makes me feel so good. As I drop the kids off for school, it is so wonderful to have tender greetings as they leave. I hope I have another 10 years to give to this.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

Sunday Dec 5
I am thankful to be a member of this church. I know that it is true. I know President Monson is a prophet of the Lord. I know God lives. I know he is mindful of all of us, and will help us with our problems if we but ask. He won't take the problems away, as we need them to become better, but he will help us to manage them. I know Jesus is our Saviour. I wish that I could behave in a way that everyone would truly know that I am a follower of Christ. Sadly I fall way short of this, but I am trying. I am thankful also for the peple locally who labor in my behalf. The Bishop, Stake President, Relief Society President and all the other people who have callings. The cub leaders must be added here, as they have been wonderful for Bryton. Thank you.

Bountiful Baskets

Saturday Dec 4. I am thankful to have found Bountiful Baskets. It is the best way I know to eat healthy and not break the bank. BB is one of my passions. I love operating a site with my co -helpers, Kendra, Ashley, and Cynthia. Each week when I see the produce we are getting I am so excited to go home and start making meals around it. We have a large base of volunteers that come out to help us and I am also thankful for them.

Thankful for Music

I love music. I'm rather eclectric about it. I like easy listening, classical, dance stuff, a little hip hop, some rock. old country, gospel, but not new Christian, Christmas etc. Lately I really like Alex Boye. I bought his CD just before the trip and listened to it several times. On the cruise I kept his music playing on the CD in my brain. I am sure it was one of the things that kept me calm and wanting to help the others. Music goes right to my soul and bouys me up. When all else fails we still have music.

Thankfulness part 2

Thursday Dec 2. Today I have two things. First of all this is a little vain but I am thankful for my credit score. I don't have as much money as many people, but I have enough. I am careful about my bills and Heavenly Father has blessed me with the ability to work things out. In September my credit score was 802. I wanted to frame a copy of it but didn't ever see a paper copy. That lets me buy the things I need . I used this score to get an awesome deal on my dream car. I don't have to worry about breaking down. It has all the bells and whistles, which are really nice. It is bright red, and I named the car Zip Zap Imagine That.
The second is Shirley Price. I've been trying to come up with a craft items for my Church Nursery job for Christmas. She just dropped by and brought a box of craft things that she didn't want any more. It will work perfectly. The kids will like doing it and the parents are going to love it. Thanks Shirley.

A month of thankfulness.

In Relief Society today they gave us all a little journal to write one thing that we are thankful for each day of this Christmas Season. I think I'd rather do it here, so here goes.
Sunday Nov 28
I stepped out of Sacrament Meeting as I do each Sunday to take Sammy home . When I came back to the meeting, the speaker, Kelly Johnson said "Oh here's Fran now". I was shocked and didn't know what was going on. Apparently, she was talking a little about miracles, and how I had one in my life when I had eye surgery. She told everyone what I difference it had been in my life, and she is right. It was a miracle. It didn't come all at once. It was actually a few years in healing. I am now thankful to say the I see well. I am thankful to Heavenly Father for letting me have this experience. I am thankful also for the doctors that spent so much of their time making this happen.
Monday Nov 29.
today I am thankful for Hot Shots. It has been a big part of my life. Pam, Kathy and Marsha danced there for all their growing up years. Now Desiree, Ariana and Sophia dance there. It has been a good place for us. I am thankful for all the trips and experiences we have had. Tonight Nutcracker was fantastic. Thanks Coleen, Natalie, and all the others that make this happen.
Tuesday Nov 30
Today I am thankful for the many people in my life, both family and friend. Without them I would be totally lost.
Brenda and Stella who help me to have fun. Without them I would have no release from work
Kathy who loves me unconditionally. She keeps me wanting to be a better person
Pam who is there to help me with much of the work and is a real joy to me
Dixie who listens to all my cries and helps me through the rough spots
Gary just for being there, even if I do complain about him too much
Holly who is always cheerful. My day is better when she drops by
Marsha who helps me keep my dreams alive
Mark who is my peacemaker
Bryton, Desi, Tommy, Ariana, Sophia, Devin, Lucy, Kyla and Macy just for being the best grandkids I could wish for. You are all children of God and I LOVE watching you grow (but please slow down as you are going to fast)
Wednesday Dec 1 I am thankful for doctors and medicine. Macey is alive today because of the help of doctors. I am grateful to live in a time when surgeries and medicines are able to help us have a better quality of life. I had an appointment today. They changed one of my meds in hopes that it will work better for me. I

My best friend Disney

After all the trauma of the cruise, I decided we should all go to Disneyland for healing and fun. I had always found solace there in the past, and for those who really know me, it is my home. I had always been told that the middle of Nov is a light crowd, and that would be great. I wanted to go early but we just couldn't pull it off. It was about 12:30 when we got there, and I noticed horrible crowds. it was worse than I had ever seen it. I found out later that it was the lighting ceremony for Christmas, and all the season pass holders were there to see it. I don't fault them for that as I would have been there too if I were in their place. It was so crowded and we were so late that we couldn't do Disney the way I usually do. The line to get a dole whip was at least an hour, so we went without. We made the best of our day and actually had a good time, and did a bunch of things that we don't usually bother with. The kids had a blast on pirate island, and the paddle boats. We spent almost all of our time in adventureland. I loved the Chirstmas haunted house. We got more drenched on splash mountain then ever before. It sure made us laugh but we were cold and wet the rest of the day. It wasn't like the many times we have ridden than ride 10 times at the end of the day and been fine. I also loved Christmas it's a small world. I have always wanted to see Disney at Christmas. We saw some fireworks, and watched Fantasmic. We had a great time. However, we spent about $800.00 for the day. That is a lot of money to spend for the little bit that we got to do. For the first time in my life I have lost the magic. I don't want to go to Disneyland. Standing in all those lines was not healing for us. I almost feel like I was hurting, so went home to talk to mother, and she wasn't there. It wasn't Disney's fault. It was just bad luck. I'm taking Pam and Desi to Disney World in March, and I know it will be totally different as we will be with a large group. I hope the magic returns for me someday.

Cruise to Nowhere

We started out on Carnival Splendor for the Mexican Riviera. We had 11 family members on board. It was supposed to be 12 but Kevin forgot his passport and couldn't board. Sunday was a little strange boarding. The ship was late boarding so we waiting in line for 3 hours. We asked the porter to joke with Marsha about her luggage getting wet. She said she really didn't want that to happen. We then got on the ship only to watch several pieces of luggage fall in the ocean. marsha was sure it was Nick's and was pretty upset. I spent the next several hours trying to get settled in, find all our rooms, and then find my family. I decided to go to bed early and have a better day tomorrow.
On Monday we were awoken by the ship shaking. Then an annoucement came on the intercom. Stella and I thought something must be up so we jumped up and got our shoes. Brenda said to wait for her. That was good because when we got to the elevators a couple was stuck in them. If we had left without Brenda, we would have been in the elevator when the power went out. We searched four levels to find someone to help with the elevator. We then went back and calmed those people down. Later that day they thanked me. The 3 or us continue to ewxplore what was going on. We were up on deck 9 when the fire drill started. We ran back down to our room on deck 2 to hellp everyone get out. Gary, Bryton, and Brandon were just coming up the stairs, in their jammas and barefoot. They stayed that way for several hours. Marsha and Nick at least had shoes on. For us the fire drill lasted most of the day, as our rooms were a bit smoky. We had no power, the toilets weren't working, and there was no running water. All activites were cancelled. Brenda needed coffee but the ship wasn't able to make any. They finally brought out some that was already made. They brought the coffee in pitchers. All the pitchers were empty, so I decided to stand right there and wait for some more. About 20 minutes later a woman was walking by with a full one and saying it was all hers. I asked her if I could please have just a half of on ounce for my sister. She then gave me hlaf an ounce and took the rest. This was the beginning of hoarding that happened all week. This day was Bryton's 9th birthday. In the afternoon I got someone from camp carnival to make him a birthday hat. He wore that and one kind man, made him a leather necklace. Bryton and Brandon enjoyed hanging out with him and watching him work the leather. We spent that day waiting for news. The public toilets began to overflow, so the captain decided to lock them and have everyone use the one in their own room. Meals wern't too bad this day. We had the leftovers from the night before, and turkey and ham sandwiches, and fruit. Many people hoarded the food and with no refridgerators, or heat to cook anything the food spoiled. The children didn't have much to do as the camp carnival was closed. We had some UNO cards and a DVD player. Brenda sat with a group of kids and let them watch one movie. We couldn't recharge it, but were glad we got the one movie out of it. By nightfall it was announced that in the night tug boats would come to tow us to Ensenada Mexico. We were worried about what would happen to us Ensenada. Melanie, Jalene and Fran slept out on the deck, mostly just for the fun of it. With no air conditioning it was necessary to sleep with the cabin door open. We rigged it the first night but after that felt safe enough. Gary was not able to use his CPAP so I hope his snoring wasn't too hard on our neighbors.
Tuesday we were up and about early as it was hard to sleep. A little tug names the Chiwahua(sp) had arrived. It was so small we all thought we were in trouble. We watched as it hooked up and started to pull us. We were told one of the tugs blew an engine so wouldn't be coming. Also we had drifted 69 miles in the wrong direction while waiting for help. It was decide to take us to San Diego instead. Everyone cheered at that. It meant we wouldn't have to get off the ship and take a 7 hour bus ride. Much of the day the ship was listing a little as the tug tried to turn our ship. Food wasn't so good. The crew tried with what they had but it was all rather gross. Some interesting things I saw were, 1. Melted iceream mixed into slft bread crumbs. 2. Bread used as a crust with pudding poured over it. Cold hotdogs diced up and mixed with various cold vegies and served into a sandwich. Cold cooked brocoli. it must have been left over from something the first day. The helicopter drop gave us better bread choices. We had tuna on a bun that was pretty good. Most of the time however we couldn't eat the filling and just ate the bread. Protein was a hard thing to find. The toilet problem and the lack of water turned the ship into a smelly mess. We enjoyed watching the human elevator as the crew formed a line from down in the galley up to deck nine to pass the food up and the dirty dishes down. There was no way to wash dishes or get rid of trash, but the crew tried to at least take it downstairs. Silverware became hard to find. At 12 noon the kid carnival opened for the first time. It made it much easier on the kids. The navy was going to drop food to us, so we all positioned ourselves to watch. During the drop it was deemed too dangerous to have all of us out on deck watching, so we had to leave the middle part of the ship. We were lucky and found a little used hallways with a good view of the drop. We entertained ourselves watching this and the USS Ronald Reagan aircraft, tht was watching over us. I saw chocolate covered strawberries, but only the first eople in line got any as they were hoarded . One lady I saw must have had 50 of them. We made friends with a family from Canada. Mom Kimberly, and Kenneth and Amelia and Henry. I've forgotten the dad's name. Our kids were always with their kids and I hope one day to find them all again. Our toilets finally got fixed this afternoon. We also got a trickle of water in our sink, which we were thankful for. Some people had enough water in their room to take cold showers but not us. Stella and Brenda were each taking turns being sick and I was lucky I didn't have to deal with that. While in line for dinner (a 2 hour wait) a woman accidently knocked into Melanie very hard. Melanie asked for an apology. Her husband than started screaming swear words at us. I asked him to calm down, and stop swearing in front of all the kids. He continued to swear. I tried to tell them the bumping was no big deal, as in a crowd that will happen. She ran off in tears and the man said he could fix it all by punching me in the nose. He stayed in line and got his dinner while his wife and baby apparently had none. Some guys are just jerks. On Thursday they were behind us in line to check in at the hotel, but thankfully they didn't notice me. We were making friends with all our ship neighbors and watching out for each other. The stairs were becoming a real hardship for many. Rosaann Gunther had swon me a little trick to help people walk easier. I used this trick on anyone I saw in need. I actually liked hanging out in the stairway to see if I could help anyone. I also lingered whenever I was down on 2 to let other families use our flashlight.
Wednesday was much the same, although the ship was smelling so bad we had to move to a different place to sit. We played cards a little. I spent a couple of hours crawling around in the dark of our room to clean it up. I used the little flashlight to look for things. I thought that it would make us all feel better and it did. Gary had lost his wallet. I tried my best but couldn't find it. The guy who worked on our floor found it for Gary with his bigger light. We tipped him extra for that. Bryton liked the camp carnival and spent a lot of time there. Melanie and Julene found me in the evening and we went to "dinner together". By this time they were serving buffet style in 2 more restaurants. They were only allowing seating on one floor of the restaurant. We sneeked into the upper floor and played cards while we watched the crowd below us. When it finally died down a bit we got plates and found a quiet place to relax. This was the only time on the ship that I had any relaxing. Some of my other family members needed me and tried to find me, but I really needed those precious few hours.
We went to bed knowing the next day we would reach San Diego.
Thursday we were up early again. About 4 in the morning we packed up the luggage. Choices for breakfast were much improved. We had pop tarts and boiled eggs along with the cereal etc. We could see the lights of San Diego. After eating we went to the front of the ship to watch it come into port. I was surprised to see all the news rporters and police officers. I had no idea we were such big news. While waiting there CNN took our picture. Kathy and Pam saw that. Kathy called the news, and that led to both of us being on TV and radio. We were in group 7 to get off the ship. They started with deck 1 and moved up. Since we were in Deck 2 we were lucky and amoung the first to get off. Carnival had made arrangements for us , but they were not right. Marsha and I got in line to fix them. Marsha and Nick went sent to the Wentin Inn in SanDiego and given meal vouchers and a flight home the next day. The rest of us were sent ot LA. When we got there I had to get in another line to arrange a hotel for us. After a wait we were sent to the Westin Inn in LA. A very nice place. It was great to get back to the car and be able to charge our phones and talk to people. We stayed there for 3 days and had meal vouchers for some of our meals. Carnival gave us all the money back for the cruise and promised to comp as another one. Some may call it an adventure. I'm not so sure. One week later I still am having sleep problems, and trouble organizing my thoughts etc. We will cruise again. I know this was an accident, and I applaud Carnival for handling it so well.